Pregnancy Tests.

So I took a pregnancy test tonight. Half of me was hoping it would be positive while the other half of me was PRAYING it would be negative. It was negative. I'm still paranoid though because this time last year I got pregnant. The first time I took the test it was negative then five days later I had a dream as did Leif, that I was pregnant so I took another and voila: It was positive.

Although I want to be pregnant again in a few months, right now is not the time. At least I don't think it is. God might have other plans?

I think its kind of disappointing when you don't get that plus sign or "Pregnant" on the test. Even when you're hoping you're not pregnant, its still kind of a let down. That's kind of how I felt for a minute or two, but then I was relieved:) Hopefully in a few months I'll have a positive test.

I'm just having one of those days...

I want to do the right thing... Which would be the wise thing.

I gave up my car to save money.
I gave up school to save money.
I gave up going out to save money.
I'm giving up my apartment to save money.

YET THERE IS NO MONEY SAVED BECAUSE OF DEBT!
Some days I just don't know what to do.

In the long wrong this is what's best. But today I don't want it to be whats best.


I want to have two cars so I can have a bit more freedom to go places.
I want to go back to school because I want my degree.
I want to go out more often.
I want to stay in my big apartment.

I'm being a bit of a baby I know. But I hate growing up sometimes.

Another Challenge.

I am trying to constantly challenge myself. To be better, to grow, to learn...

Currently I'm challenging myself to dive deeper into the word. To get as much as I can out of it, during each devotion time.

I'm expecting great results:) Lots and lots of growth and wisdom.